Want to influence people better? Stop being enthusiastic all the time.

Please note: this post may seem controversial. In my opinion, one of the absolutely central pillars of sales is wanting to help your prospect. And it is essential that the salesperson is absolutely convinced that their product or service can really help their prospect. But wanting to help and being "enthusiastic" are two completely different things. I am happy to discuss the difference with you if it is important to you.

So...

Imagine this situation. You receive a phone call from a prospective customer you have never spoken to before.

"Hello, a mutual friend, Jean Dupont, gave me your contact details and spoke very highly of your solution. I have done my research and it seems to be exactly what we are looking for. Can we arrange a meeting so that you can give us a demonstration?"

Nice, isn't it? How would you respond to this prospect? Try taking a piece of paper and a pencil and writing down the type of response you would give. We will come back to this at the end of this article.

Let's take a step back and talk about enthusiasm.

There is too often a perception that one of the qualities of a good salesperson is enthusiasm. A little bit like a pom pom girl jumping up and down to cheer her team.

If you're not sure about this, I suggest you take a look at the sales job offers on LinkedIn. Almost all of these offers specify that candidates must be "enthusiastic", or "full of energy" or "dynamic", which are just other words for enthusiastic. Here's an example below:

Why? Because today, as in the past, employers are convinced that this enthusiasm will be persuasive, even the ideal weapon for winning over a prospect. A prospect is very likely to be won over by a salesperson who knows their product and demonstrates a ton of positive feelings, right?

Unfortunately not. The reality is different.

Not convinced? Think about the last time you went into a clothes shop looking for a jumper or some other item of clothing. You see the sales assistant coming towards you, all smiles and full of energy, saying:

“Hello, how may I help you?”

What is your initial response?

“No thank you, I'm just looking.”

Just like 90% of the population. Why? Because you're afraid they won't leave you alone and will try to sell you something against your will. You are a victim of a psychological phenomenon known as reactance.

Identified in the mid-1960s, it is activated in our brains when we fear that we are not free to make our own choices. I will say more about this in another post.

Four reasons why enthusiasm is counterproductive in sales.

We see it in everyday life: enthusiasm does not help sales. Well, in the B2B sector, it's the same thing. Buyers suffer from the same biases that you suffer from (without knowing it) when shopping for your new jumper, trousers or shirt ("that one suits you well!").

Here are four specific reasons why being full of energy is counterproductive:

1- When we are enthusiastic, we generate a psychological phenomenon in our prospects known as reactance. Reactance is simply a human reaction that occurs when we sense that someone is trying to make us do something that will cause us to lose our free will. In this case, humans will do exactly the opposite, even if they are aware that what the other person is suggesting is good for them. Have you ever seen people respond to the campaign: "Smoking kills, stop smoking"? Neither have I. This short video explains an approach to managing this risk of reactance.

2- Enthusiasm is the best way to avoid listening to our prospects' problems. When we are enthusiastic, we want to share the subject of our enthusiasm. In the case of a salesperson, they have most likely been trained on their product and all its benefits and features. This is the comfort zone for almost all salespeople. However, asking difficult questions of their prospects is not. And we shouldn't blame our salespeople for this, as they were never taught to ask questions. So they talk about what they know and are not interested in their prospects.

3- Enthusiastic people have what we might call "happy ears". Sorry? "Happy ears"? What on earth is that?

When a prospect says something like "That's interesting" or "Tell me more" and we think they're interested in buying, we're all ears. And an inexperienced salesperson has only one goal in mind: to sell, rather than to help their prospect. Have you ever had prospects that I would describe as "hot" who turned out to be dead ducks, in other words, who were only there to gather information?

Or, conversely, a prospect who seemed to be going nowhere and who has become one of your best customers? "Happy ears" therefore prevent us from being interested in our prospect, cloud our perception of reality and mislead us.

4-One of the classic approaches in sales is to use a demonstration or presentation with a prospect. However, a demo/presentation is a means of giving information, not obtaining it. A salesperson's job is to sell first and educate second. Product experts are there to educate.

Or other inexperienced salespeople who will be happy to educate the prospect. Sales professionals, whether selling products or services, are there to be experts in answering questions and to maintain control of the conversation and therefore the process.

So, what do I do?

Very good question. I will publish the rest shortly. Stay tuned or contact me if you can't wait.